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Circus Trip 2018: The Home Stretch…

Tomorrow I’m leaving California for home.  I don’t want to, but I have to get back to restart things at home.  I have been away almost four months, and in California for over a month.  I don’t want to, but it’s time.

I’m not sure how it will feel to be back home.   I am excited to see my friends and family.  Excited to see my horse and my cat.  Excited to see fall in one of the beautiful places in this country.

I feel more ambivalent about the house.  It is beautiful, but it is too large for just me, and it is a lot to maintain.  My ex-husband wanted a larger house after we married, but I miss the small home I owned when I was single.  When we got divorced, it made financial sense to stay in my house, and I wasn’t emotionally in a space to pack everything up and move, but I have been thinking for a while about whether I want those memories there.  I know it is time to make new ones.

Leaving California to go home also means leaving someone special to me.  A month here has given me one of the things I have been missing most in life – love and affection.  I won’t be cryptic – I found someone – or to be more accurate, he found me.  I’ll introduce you in another post.

So tomorrow morning I’ll be back in the car for the long drive north.  Sigh…

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Missing Oliver

On June 21st, my dear sweet Oliver passed over the Rainbow Bridge.  As you know, he had Fibrosarcoma for about 18 months, and had two surgeries to slow its progression.  Sadly, these tumors are almost never cured, and his had grown large again…

I brought him home from the shelter in 2005, about six weeks after Zorro died.  He was a little over a year old at the time.  Full of spunk, and ready to give his older sister Martini a run for her money.  He was long and lanky, and much bigger than her, but he never quite had the courage to stand up to her when she laid down the law.

 

After Martini died, I realized just what a lap cat Oliver had always wanted to be.  He proudly took up his spot on my lap during movies and snuggled against my chest at night.  He loved sleeping in his puff by my computer.  He hated when Coraline bullied him out of his spot, but sometimes she just wanted to cuddle.

Oliver and Coraline Snuggling – Don’t they look happy holding hands?

Oliver was never much into people food, but loved to chew on things.  Paper, the corners of the furniture, the corners of books – there are quite a few items around my house that bear his tiny teeth marks.

He also loved to drink water out of the faucet, and would turn up his nose if the water in his bowl wasn’t fresh enough…  He would wait until I stirred in the morning, but once I appeared as if I might be awake, it was a free-for-all to get me out of bed for his breakfast.  He got smart in his later years though and wouldn’t leave his perch until it was clear that I was going downstairs, lest he get rudely kicked out of the bedroom so I could snatch another hour…

 

I hope you are having a good time in heaven, Oliver; you are sorely missed…

Oliver’s Hump

Oliver is still here.  His tumor keeps growing; I have taken to calling him Quasimodo, because he looks like a hunchback.  It is hard to tell in the photo, but it is large and firm.  It is more uncomfortable for him now when I give him his fluids, since I imagine the fluids don’t feel good when they stretch out his already stretched skin.

Despite all this, he is purring, eating and still jumping up on the bed, so I guess it isn’t time yet.

Slowing Down…

This dear boy had a hard night the other night.  He wasn’t waiting at the door when I got home and I found him sleeping hard in a closet where he rarely goes.

He only ate a little dinner and then was in some pain, although he did settle down on my bed and slept peacefully all night.

It was a fretful night for me, but the next day he seemed better.

You can see how large his tumor has gotten in the photo.  It is the hump he sports on his right shoulder…  It is growing quickly, and I can only imagine it is infiltrating his heart and lungs.

Oliver’s Hump

Thankfully, he is usually doing well, purring and eating and thumping his little sister when he is tired of her bothering him.

I’ll take all the time I can get with him.

 

Oliver’s Bedtime

Oliver is enjoying his time spent cuddling with me more and more.  He sleeps the sleep of the dead at night…  The other night he was lying down, waiting for me to finish folding the laundry and go to bed.  I tucked the duvet up around him and he just stayed like this.  What a cutie!